365 DAYS OF REHAB POP:

1 SONG/DAY TO STOP DYING/START LIVING

I’VE BEEN TALKING TO MYSELF LATELY
I’M ASKING FOR ADVICE, OH
I’VE BEEN SLOWLY LOOSENING
MY GRIP ON THIS REALITY
TONGUE-TIED, THE DOMINOES BREAK
SO WON’T YOU LEND ME YOUR FAITH

Look, it’s ok to be broken. Never going to be someone to say it isn’t. Anytime the last 6 years, you stop me on the street and ask me who the goddamn I am and why I’m breathing and I’d tell you I saw me as someone standing in a rush of cars being slammed into my body at 150km/h, limbs streaming into sky and street. But I had the surgeon skills and the nylon sutures wrapped around my neon glowsticks (to search for all the bits of skin in the dark)to stitch my arm back on as I continued to party, to reattach tendons and ligaments and leg to me as I continued to limp towards a light that looked like it would never come. And I goddamn had the power. That takes power, all the scared sensations shoo’d away. But it was a sad way to live. Not gonna lie. And one day I looked up and noticed the ‘party’ was just me clapping along to songs, clapping back at ghosts. And decided to rehab, liberate the happiness in me. All because someone asked me: what brings you happiness? And I did not know anymore.

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